She lies in a bed of flowers

I knew this day was coming, and I dreaded the day it would arrive...

These past few weeks, I noticed that she was not quite herself; she had slowed with age, but managed to still keep up with me. I glanced at her sadly, knowing her time as my companion was nearing it's end. It has been 5 days since her passing, and now I find it fitting to retell one of our past adventures. With this, I say goodbye, my little princess; you will be missed.



Dropping my phone has become a habit; a bad habit that to this day I have not overcome. The back of my phone will not even stay on now, unless assisted by tape. Ahhh, but I love my phone; my phone and I have been through a lot and into a lot of things. She is a girly phone too, all shiny and pink like a princess.

There was a day when my little princess phone became a dirty girl. On the day she became a dirty girl, I made the mistake of carrying her in the breast pocket of my scrub top. On this day, I was eagerly awaiting a call and she was set to vibrate when calls came in, and the only pocket I could place her in where I would feel that vibration was my breast pocket. I thought to myself, when I placed her snugly in my pocket, that I was going to drop her today, and the question for the day would be onto or into what would I drop her? Early afternoon, that question was answered.

A patient rang out to be assisted to the bathroom, only this patient was in the Chest Pain Center, actively experiencing mild chest discomfort. I, being the vigilant and thorough nurse, would not allow this patient to ambulate to the bathroom which was 6 feet from her stretcher. My patient was destined to void on the ever popular and loved plastic bedpan. After my patient completed her business, I removed the beloved bedpan, placed it on the floor, and carefully assisted my patient in redressing herself. When finished, as I bent over to pick up the bedpan, I felt a sense of dread, and then I felt my little princess slipping out of my pocket. I watched and heard her plop into the urine filled bedpan. My cat-like reflexes kicked in, immediately plucking her from her dirty bath. Ohhh, she was now a dirty girl!

After cleaning her multiple times with toxic wipes, alcohol, and again with toxic wipes, she functioned beautifully. Now, she no longer rides along in the breast pocket of my tops, and when people ask to borrow her, my princess phone, I never tell her dirty secret.

Saying Goodbye

My week started off horribly and it has continued to be extremely sad. Saturday night and into Sunday morning, I cared for a former coworker who was gravely ill. Probably the entire staff of the medical unit I work on, at one point, assisted in trying to stabilize this person. All our efforts failed, thus my former coworker experienced a horrible death. It was utterly horrific.

Today, my son's dog, Molly, was put down. In 2002, we found Molly at the SPCA when my son, Seth, wanted a dog for his birthday. I told Seth, "The smaller the better," and so he settled on Molly, a cute 1 yr old 5lb terrier mix. Molly was one of the smartest dogs we welcomed in to our home. When she was younger, Molly would do what we asked of her with spunk in her step. Her favorite toys were a tennis ball and the latex squeaky chew creations the pet store offered. With the tennis ball, if you rolled the ball to her, she would stop it with her nose, and then very precisely roll it back to you...she loved this. The squeaky chew toys, she wrestled with...she was our comic relief. Molly also loved car rides, hanging ten with her nose out the window taking in all the scents. In more recent years, Molly had lost her sight, but not her spunk. Though Molly was tiny, her personality remained huge. It is sweet to know that someone so small can leave such a warm feeling in your heart. We will always love you, our little Molly-bo-Bolly. We miss you dearly...