Halloween is a wonderful holiday; I absolutely love all the ghoulish festivities, making children work for their candy (this year a coin toss--had to land a coin on dinnerware), and creating my grand-daughter's costume. I tend to be a people watcher, too, more so during this holiday than any other. Some of the costume ideas people come up with are absolutely original and awesome. Other ideas people have, like adults buying some store bought costume, stuffing themselves into it, and then wearing it out in public...OMG!!! What were they thinking!
Being Catholic at heart, and being raised in a Catholic school from the start, I was taught that if you thought something wicked, you have sinned. Oh what a sinner I was in elementary school, and yes I was very consistent. Though I felt much guilt and a touch of shame for all those wicked thoughts, having to go to confession weekly to cleanse my wicked soul, did not deter my evil ways. Why just yesterday, I observed Wonder Woman clutching a bag of candy, only this was an impostor! Wonder Woman was stuffed into her sexy outfit--it was bulging at the seams! Where did her girlish figure go?? This was a ghoulish figure! Was this her intention, after all it is Halloween? I suspect this impostor splurged on too many Krispy Kreams, Duncan Donuts, Big Macs, etc. I wanted to rip the clutched bag of candy from her hands and yell, "No more woman! This must stop!" Immediately after those thoughts crossed my mind, I said to myself, "Oh Marie, you are so going to Hell." I chuckled to myself, because I know I have a fast track ticket to meet Satan, as evidenced by my continued consistent wicked thoughts. What would the nuns at Sacred Heart say if they knew this has continued well into my 40s? Here comes the guilt, that is quickly washed away again by a chuckle, and I just love when I do that and people stare, wondering what I am chuckling at. Currently, my husband sits puzzled by this thought. I need only say three words, and he gets it. "Going to Hell," because of my wicked, wicked ways.
Marie, I have very bad memories of the Catholic school. All but one nun hated me. I was a "hell raiser," but for goodness sakes, why did they feel it was necessary to assault my hands with a ruler? I would have rather had a good old fashioned butt whooping! Have you seen my hands lately? Look at them next time your over at the house! Especially the right hand.
ReplyDeleteThat said, I must say this about your thoughts. I, too, from time to time have very dark and downright cruel thoughts about some things, and people (mostly people). I realize that while in this world, our sin nature is still very much alive, and tempting us all the time to do wrong, and think wrong. When these thoughts cross my mind, and sometimes hang around longer than necessary, I eventually come to the realization that this is not the way to handle it, nor is it the proper way to think towards things or people.
I realize one thing to be very true in my life..."Except for the Grace of God, there go I." I WAS a very mean and nasty person. I was a very verbally abusive husband towards my dear sweet wife. Except for God's grace, I would be divorced, and would never have had the joy of experiencing all my family has brought to my life. The Lord had mercy on this wicked man, and saved my marriage, and more importantly, my soul. My sins are paid for, then, now, and future. What a marvelous Saviour is Jesus my Lord!
Am I still "rough around the edges?" You know the answer to that...Without a doubt I am rough around the edges, and everywhere else. After 27 years of screwing up my life, the past 17 years I have been living a new life (Humm...I just told my age).
Some people equate Christians as ones who think they are perfect. Not this Christian! I have a perfect Saviour, and in this life, I look to Him for help, and strength...Not myself. A self-righteous person looks to themselves for their salvation, and looks down on others. It is a trap that the Lord never intended for His children to fall into, and it is hard to get out of the trap. Heh, listen to me...I am rambling.
I love ya Sis, and will always be here for ya! Just realize that you are not the only one who has those fleeting moments of sinister thoughts. It can be bothersome at times, but also it can be downright funny.